From catching your parents doing IT on the kitchen table to having to serve your ex and his date, read these horror stories and you’ll never moan about your Valentine’s Day again…
1“I’m not big on Valentine’s, so it was fine by me when my boyfriend asked if I’d mind him going out for his mate’s birthday. What I did mind, however, was him ringing at 3am to ask if I’d pick him up because he’d lost his clothes! So, that was my Valentine’s night: collecting my naked boyfriend from town, where he stood loudly proclaiming his love for me.” – Kerry, 24
2“I went out with the lads last year as we were all single; it was a good night – until I came home and found my parents bent over the kitchen table. And no, they weren’t eating. Scarred for life.” – Benji, 27
3“I’d just broken up with my boyfriend, so I was going to go to work, keep my head down and try to ignore the day. Which would have worked if my boss hadn’t sent me to hand deliver a huge R3 000 bouquet to his girlfriend. Worse still, I had to walk through town as strangers stopped me to admire the flowers and say things like, ‘He must love you a lot,’ then have to explain over and over that no, they weren’t for me. So much for ignoring the day.” – Lily, 27
4“As a treat, I dressed up as a sexy policewoman – complete with handcuffs and a plastic gun. I tied my boyfriend up on the bed, then jokingly ‘shot’ him, thinking the gun would just make a sound. Nope, it contained actual plastic pellets – that don’t hurt that much… unless they hit your bare tackle. I’ll never forget his howl… and the lack of sex after.” – Jodie, 29
5“I work in a hotel that runs a Valentine’s offer: dinner and an overnight stay. I was newly single and wanted to be busy so I signed up to work. What wasn’t in the plan was having to wait the table where my ex was sitting – with his new girlfriend (who I didn’t know existed). Worse still, while they ate dessert, I had to scatter rose petals on all the beds and leave out massage-oil sets. I was literally prepping my ex to have sex with another woman. Fantastic.” – Charlotte, 25
6“My boyfriend made me an amazing Valentine’s meal, completely from scratch. Later, getting jiggy, I started feeling a horrendous burning sensation down there. Turns out he hadn’t washed his hands properly after chopping chillies. I spent the night with nothing more exciting than a cold flannel between my legs.” – Erin, 28
7“Valentine’s Day 2011 was by far the worst: I found out I was being made redundant, then discovered I’d been locked out. My housemate was away on a mini-break with his girlfriend, of course, so I had to stay on my mum’s sofa. But only after she’d made me construct a set of drawers from Ikea.” – Philip, 31
T aken from GLAMOUR UK. Read the original article here.
Single this V-Day? Round up your friends and do this… If you’re taken, check out these 5 amazing Valentine’s treats that’ll impress your loved one.
