There’s no doubt about it, long distance relationships are always a gamble and they can be hard. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be in one. Like most things, people tend to focus on the challenges of an unconventional situation. People will ask: how will it work? Don’t you need to see them more? Can you properly trust them?
But what they don’t do is focus on what there is to be gained and that complications can be managed. You both have space to pursue what you want to and when you do see each other, it’s proper quality time. In the vein of positivity, we’ve drawn up a list of 6 golden rules for keeping the fire alive, even if you are on other sides of the world…
1 Communication
Communication is key in any relationship but when it comes to a long distance one, it’s all about how you manage it. You may be tempted to create rules so that you know that you’ll speak to each other a lot but expectations can cause real strain. If your partner’s meeting runs late (it happens), you’ll end up becoming frustrated that you haven’t received the third promised phone call of the day and then judge your whole relationship on it. Keep an eye that communication is regular but remember, it needs to happen organically otherwise you’ll both end up unhappy.
2 Don’t jump to conclusions
One of the side effects of being in a long distance relationship is that you can end up feeling insecure and jealous. You may not know your partner’s new friends or colleagues, who they’re close to or who they’re meeting. Of course, this would make anyone feel unsettled. But the best thing you can do is talk about it. Discussing should reassure you and will prevent the issue becoming bigger than it needs to be. If you do have reason to worry that they’re cheating, you’ll soon find out anyway so be as open as you can from the beginning.
3 Plan ahead
It’s no secret humans generally feel happier when they have things to look forward to. Sure, it may feel a little unsexy and unspontaneous to introduce diary meetings but planning ahead will only make things easier. Set dates to visit each other so you can get to know their environment and plan fun trips and holidays. That way you know when you’ll next have time together and it’ll help to keep you focused on keeping the relationship alive.
4 Manage expectations
When you’re apart, missing each other and wondering if it’s all worth it, it can be doubly disappointing when plans or Skype dates fall through. Learn to recognise that even if you were living in the same house, disappointments happen in all relationships. As long as they’re not happening more often than not, try and be understanding that life is busy even if you are owed a phone call. If you manage expectations – it will prevent a lot of unnecessary heartache.
5 Don’t just rely on technology
Send things to each other. Little postcards, flowers, presents, whatever. Post is romantic, it shows you’re really thinking of each other. Technology, although completely brilliant, can make things a little mundane.
6 Relish your situations and say yes to things
Being long distance can give you precious space for personal growth. You can truly live independently and you’re not held back by the temptation of your partner being home all the time. Make the most of the place you live, say yes to things you wouldn’t normally and make fun plans with all of your friends. The happier you are, the less you’ll hate long distance, the more likely your relationship is to work.
Taken from GLAMOUR UK. Read the original article here.
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