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Breaking up while living together – is there an easy way to do it?

Moving in with a partner can be a hugely exciting new chapter in both your lives. Breaking up with them, not so much. Is there a way to end the relationship and the co-habitation painlessly? Not really, as it turns out, but if you’re ready to call it a day, there are a few steps you can take to ensure the process runs as smoothly as possible. 

Make sure you’re sure 

Do you really want to end the relationship or are you just temporarily bored/stressed/irritated? Before you make a potentially life-altering decision, take some time to ensure it’s what you really want.  

Plan ahead 

Ok, so you’re sure. Now you’ll need an exit strategy. Will you leave and stay with a friend once the deed is done? Or will you need your partner to leave? Whichever option you choose, make sure you’ve considered all the logistics necessary for a straightforward transition. 

Don’t go there 

Once you give your partner the news, it’s safe to say they’ll be upset, and maybe even a little blindsided, too. It’s not necessary to unleash every tiny thing that’s ever bothered you as well. Be civil, be kind and make it a clean, considerate break for both your sakes. 

Set a date 

For moving out, that is. The longer the two of you procrastinate, the more likely you are to fall back into old romantic habits that will no longer serve you. Set a moving date that both of you agree on. 

Divide and conquer 

You own this, they own that, both of you own that other one together. The stress of it all! As you’re the one who broke the news, offering to be the one to divide up your possessions is a kind gesture. Be prepared to compromise though – after all, it’s just stuff. 

Give each other space 

Physically and emotionally. Once the words have been said, you’ll both need time to process. Decide on who’s going to be in so that you each have the privacy you need. Respect each other’s boundaries and treat your breakup with the dignity it deserves. 

For more relationship advice click here to find out the  5 things to consider before starting relationship counselling!

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